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This blog is a space to share my experiences during my Peace Corps service. It is also a space to share my art, and to question everything from female agency to fried hotdogs. I hope you enjoy :)

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

The longest Road: My Path to The Peace Corps


            As I work on this blog, I am meeting lots of new people. Many are perspective Peace Corps Volunteers. They see me living this wonderful life of service and want to know how I got here.  When I was in their place, I devoured every blog, Peace Corps message board, and book  about how to get to Peace Corps land. I’d love to share my detour filled path to Panama with you all.

            I learned about the Peace Corps through word of mouth and decided that it was for me. All my life I had been of service to others. I traveled all over the world with organizations and was ultra involved in high school. I was the girl in  school that was president of everything, star of everything, and somehow kept a 3.9 g.p.a.  College was very different. I worked for the Obama Campaign and started a live arts show but that was it in terms of involvement. I knew I wanted to give more of myself and live internationally. I had dreams of working for UNICEF and helping children all around the world. The Peace Corps sounded like a wonderful way to give back and live the life of a development worker. So one day I walked into the kitchen of my parent’s house and told my stepmom, “I want to join the Peace Corps”.  She stood and stared. “Ok baby but it is very competitive are you ready for that?” I said that I was. As senior year started, I started the process in earnest. I got my recommendations, and worked hard on my application. By early January 2010 my application was complete. My parents were still wondering when I was going to start my graduate school applications.  At this point I decided that I did not want to go to graduate school right away. I needed to do the Peace Corps first or work.  I needed the space away from school. This was a huge let down for my parents at first. They did not understand why I would put all my eggs in the Peace Corps basket and not entertain the option of applying to graduate school. Why would I put myself in poverty and harsh conditions for 2 years when I could be pushing myself to the upper middleclass life that they had provided for me.            
            I kept on the road that I knew was right for me. I had my interview and a week later I got a call from my recruiter. Ms. Wong had called to tell me that I would be nominated and that I looked at as competitive. There was a program that was about to close out but I would get that slot once I got through medical/dental and legal.  This should be easy I thought. I am healthy minus the asthma. I was turned into a pincushion while the medical office took blood and ran test. I got all of my X-rays and found and fixed my first cavity. I was nominated for South or Central America and was to leave in July or Aug of 2010. I was so excited! I told everybody I knew. I did not look for a job. I just tried to prepare myself for service. In May, I got a letter saying that I was put on hold until I got my wisdom teeth pulled out. My wisdom teeth did not bother me and it would be expensive but I did it. As the blood was still in my mouth during recovery and letter from the Peace Corps came. In it was not my invitation but a letter of deferment. I had been deferred from my dream for a year, held in purgatory.
I also had another package in my medical that many people may not have. When you fill out you preliminary medical application you are asked to check boxes for everything that applies to you. There was a box that said, “Have you ever been to a therapist or participated in group?”  I checked the yes box and didn’t think much of it at the time.  My childhood and teenage years had been filled with allot of trauma and I had a totally different life when I entered college.  My family and I thought it would be smart to take advantage of the free therapy on my campus. I saw a therapist for the majority of my college experience and joined Black Women’s support group and also a mindfulness meditation group. At different points in college I had anxiety and had a small bout with depression. This is something that most if not all college students grapple with during their college experience.  My time in therapy helped me develop coping mechanisms that others don’t have. I actually viewed this as an asset.  The Peace Corps thought otherwise. I was so embarrassed and sad. I had told everyone I was leaving and had not looked for a job. I challenged the findings by the Peace Corps and my therapist wrote a letter in my defense. She felt that I was more then ready to serve. The Peace Corps stood by their decision. I would have to wait a year and then get another write off from my therapist to declare that I could exist without therapy.  I found a job as a substitute teacher. I was so good that I would be picked up to teach classes’ long term. I taught kindergarten for 3 months and taught high school Spanish for 4 months. It was very difficult but I was also doing something that I loved. I lived independent for the first time and paid bills for the first time. I fell in love and broke up with my first love.  In short, I became an adult. In the summer I began to au pair for a doctor family that also doubled as my mentors. During this time my parents became even more upset. I still had not applied to grad school. I was still banking on the Peace Corps working out.  I come from a family of strivers. Ivy league trained lawyers, MBA holders, and my father is a fierce intellectual. It was unfathomable for them to have their daughter living in the hood working a job without benefits. They stood by me although they were confused and worried.  In May of 2011, I got off of deferment and received a call from Peace Corps.  Although I had dedicated my academic life to studying the Latino World and economics there was no room for me in Latin America. I was offered Tunisia or Morocco.  This was just as the Sexual Assaults of Volunteers was receiving prime time coverage. The Middle East was a dangerous place for a woman, especially a woman who was not Muslim or religious at all. I was told that I could leave by July but I had a day to say yes to the Middle East… I said no.  I was told that I would have to wait until August for another shot and that I would take that spot or would not serve. I waited and sure enough in August a huge blue packet arrived at my parents house.  I finally got my invitation! I was going to be a CEC volunteer in Panama. My father thought Community Environmental Conservation was a fancy way of saying that I would spend 2 years picking up trash in the street. Lol In spite of this he and my stepmom supported me. My grandparents were very afraid but as time drew near they became more proud. The next few months were amazing. I worked even more on my mindfulness and mental health. I lived with amazing friends, I worked full time at an amazing school near my house. By January it was time to say my goodbyes and leave my old life for my new one.  I started this journey in 2010 and it is now 2012. It was a long journey but now everyone in my life sees that it was well worth the wait.

So that’s my story guys! If you want this Peace Corps life stay as flexible as you can but don’t sell yourself out for something that you know won’t work for you. Also do not sell all your stuff when you get your nomination. You never know how long you will have to wait.

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